Renowned director Steven Spielberg's remake of the 1933 cult monster classic ‘King Kong' has stalled in the pre-production phase, in a row over whether the giant ape should have a visible 10-foot penis.
Spielberg said he was "outraged" at a decision by film company Paramount Pictures to scrap his plans for the virtual computer-generated beast to be suitably well endowed.
"I've always been a huge advocate of realism and artistic integrity," said the maker of Close Encounters of the Third Kind and AI. "If this industry is to move with the times, then it's utterly essential that we be allowed to portray a 75-foot ape with the appropriate package in the downstairs department."
Fans said they agreed with Spielberg.
"Let's face it, it won't be very convincing if the most chaotic and volatile monster of cinema history is forced to straddle the Empire State Building looking like a Fisher Price toy," said fantasy and sci-fi fan Ernie Tanks.
Paramount has defended its actions, saying that initial screen shots of Kong's giant member had confirmed fears that the sight would be "too comical" for younger viewers.
"We trialled the penis shots on test audiences and most of the children were in fits of laughter," said Paramount spokesman Tony Shanks. "Many of them turned to their fathers and said ‘His is much bigger than yours, daddy'."
Meanwhile Spielberg's camp has denied that Kong's controversial penis was modelled on that of pop star Michael Jackson's pet chimp Bubbles.
"An approach was made to Mr Jackson but he made it crystal clear that he was the only person allowed near Bubbles' genitalia," said one source close to the director.
ROFFLMFAO How did i miss this? I think that endowing him is a big mistake, that's the millions of dolars that the comapny doesn't make from sneeking theit kids in and playing it on Family Night.
ROFFLMFAO How did i miss this? I think that endowing him is a big mistake, that's the millions of dolars that the comapny doesn't make from sneeking theit kids in and playing it on Family Night.
But funny as fuck that it was a discussion.
excuse me i need another drink, I am scarred.
What happend to "I am a horrible parent, my kid is going to the hospital in an ambulance, I will never drink again"????????
ROFFLMFAO How did i miss this? I think that endowing him is a big mistake, that's the millions of dolars that the comapny doesn't make from sneeking theit kids in and playing it on Family Night.
But funny as fuck that it was a discussion.
excuse me i need another drink, I am scarred.
What happend to "I am a horrible parent, my kid is going to the hospital in an ambulance, I will never drink again"????????
Oh well for that i have a "simple.....fuck you, kiss, my ass. when you are perfect let me know and send me the instructions, asshole."
ROFFLMFAO How did i miss this? I think that endowing him is a big mistake, that's the millions of dolars that the comapny doesn't make from sneeking theit kids in and playing it on Family Night.
But funny as fuck that it was a discussion.
excuse me i need another drink, I am scarred.
What happend to "I am a horrible parent, my kid is going to the hospital in an ambulance, I will never drink again"????????
Oh well for that i have a "simple.....fuck you, kiss, my ass. when you are perfect let me know and send me the instructions, asshole."
ROFFLMFAO How did i miss this? I think that endowing him is a big mistake, that's the millions of dolars that the comapny doesn't make from sneeking theit kids in and playing it on Family Night.
But funny as fuck that it was a discussion.
excuse me i need another drink, I am scarred.
What happend to "I am a horrible parent, my kid is going to the hospital in an ambulance, I will never drink again"????????
Oh well for that i have a "simple.....fuck you, kiss, my ass. when you are perfect let me know and send me the instructions, asshole."
BUT WHAT ABOUT THE KIDS??
It's called Grannies, fuckwad....Like i even owe you an explanation, sheeesh.
In the real world, the penis of an adult male gorilla is only 2 inches and their testicles are not that big either.......that organ is only needed for one thing...maybe 2 since they fondle themselves a lot. Thei penis is not used to attract females;and it only needs to get the spern where it needs to be. Male gorillas just use their strength to take what they want....
Female gorillas have larger sexual organs in relation their body size because they need use then to attract males when they are in estrus. The swell and scream "I am ready baby......"
King Kong probably has one, but we just cant see it....I never looked, but now I will.
__________________
"The life given us by nature is short; but the memory of a well-spent life is eternal." -Cicero
In the real world, the penis of an adult male gorilla is only 2 inches and their testicles are not that big either.......that organ is only needed for one thing...maybe 2 since they fondle themselves a lot. Thei penis is not used to attract females;and it only needs to get the spern where it needs to be. Male gorillas just use their strength to take what they want....
Female gorillas have larger sexual organs in relation their body size because they need use then to attract males when they are in estrus. The swell and scream "I am ready baby......"
King Kong probably has one, but we just cant see it....I never looked, but now I will.
__________________
oh yes, you must always satisfy the monkey. Strong and Beautiful smells like a monkey
In the real world, the penis of an adult male gorilla is only 2 inches and their testicles are not that big either.......that organ is only needed for one thing...maybe 2 since they fondle themselves a lot. Thei penis is not used to attract females;and it only needs to get the spern where it needs to be. Male gorillas just use their strength to take what they want....
Female gorillas have larger sexual organs in relation their body size because they need use then to attract males when they are in estrus. The swell and scream "I am ready baby......"
King Kong probably has one, but we just cant see it....I never looked, but now I will.
So when my wife told me I was hung like an adult gorilla, thats NOT a compliment??
__________________
A monday morning lunatic disturbed from time to time...
ROFFLMFAO How did i miss this? I think that endowing him is a big mistake, that's the millions of dolars that the comapny doesn't make from sneeking theit kids in and playing it on Family Night.
But funny as fuck that it was a discussion.
excuse me i need another drink, I am scarred.
What happend to "I am a horrible parent, my kid is going to the hospital in an ambulance, I will never drink again"????????
Oh well for that i have a "simple.....fuck you, kiss, my ass. when you are perfect let me know and send me the instructions, asshole."
In the real world, the penis of an adult male gorilla is only 2 inches and their testicles are not that big either.......that organ is only needed for one thing...maybe 2 since they fondle themselves a lot. Thei penis is not used to attract females;and it only needs to get the spern where it needs to be. Male gorillas just use their strength to take what they want....
Female gorillas have larger sexual organs in relation their body size because they need use then to attract males when they are in estrus. The swell and scream "I am ready baby......"
King Kong probably has one, but we just cant see it....I never looked, but now I will.
So when my wife told me I was hung like an adult gorilla, thats NOT a compliment??
No..its not. There are actually evolutionary studies testing the theory using that nugget of info as a tool. (pun intended) Adult male gorillas have a teenie weinie in relation to their body size . Most human males dont have that problem.
At least I hope they dont.
-- Edited by Bread Styx at 11:56, 2006-11-04
__________________
"The life given us by nature is short; but the memory of a well-spent life is eternal." -Cicero
No..its not. There are actually evolutionary studies testing the theory using that bugget of info as a tool. (pun intended) Adult male gorillas have a teenie weinie in relation to their body size . Most human males dont have that problem.
At least I hope they dont.
Bugget?
__________________
oh yes, you must always satisfy the monkey. Strong and Beautiful smells like a monkey
No..its not. There are actually evolutionary studies testing the theory using that bugget of info as a tool. (pun intended) Adult male gorillas have a teenie weinie in relation to their body size . Most human males dont have that problem.
At least I hope they dont.
Bugget?
Yes, that is short for butter nugget!
Correction has been made!
__________________
"The life given us by nature is short; but the memory of a well-spent life is eternal." -Cicero
No..its not. There are actually evolutionary studies testing the theory using that bugget of info as a tool. (pun intended) Adult male gorillas have a teenie weinie in relation to their body size . Most human males dont have that problem.
At least I hope they dont.
Bugget?
Yes, that is short for butter nugget!
Correction has been made!
It made me laugh. Bugget.
Bugget.
__________________
oh yes, you must always satisfy the monkey. Strong and Beautiful smells like a monkey
No..its not. There are actually evolutionary studies testing the theory using that bugget of info as a tool. (pun intended) Adult male gorillas have a teenie weinie in relation to their body size . Most human males dont have that problem.
At least I hope they dont.
Bugget?
Yes, that is short for butter nugget!
Correction has been made!
It made me laugh. Bugget.
Bugget.
Good; I imagine you have a great laugh!
You may use Bugget in my title if you wish..be creative!
That way you can laugh everytime you see it.
__________________
"The life given us by nature is short; but the memory of a well-spent life is eternal." -Cicero
oh yes, you must always satisfy the monkey. 
