Ethel was a bit of a demon in her wheelchair, and loved to charge around the
nursing home, taking corners on one wheel and getting up to maximum speed on
the long corridors.
Because the poor woman was one sandwich short of a picnic the other residents tolerated her and some of them actually joined in.
One day Ethel was speeding up one corridor when a door opened and Kooky Clarence stepped out with his arm outstretched. "STOP!," he shouted in a firm voice. "Have you got a license for that thing?" Ethel fished around in her handbag and pulled out a Kit Kat wrapper and held it up to him. "OK" he said, and away Ethel sped down the hall.
As she took the corner near the TV lounge on one wheel, weird Harold popped out in front of her and shouted "STOP! Have you got proof of insurance?" Ethel dug into her handbag, pulled out a drink coaster and held it up to him. Harold nodded and said "On your way, Ma'am." As Ethel neared the
final corridor, Crazy Craig stepped out in front of her, Butt- Naked, and holding
his "You-Know- What" in his hand.
"Oh, good grief," yelled Ethel, "Not that Damn Breathalyzer Test again.!!!"
( NOW I DON'T CARE WHO YOU ARE, THAT'S FUNNY!)
__________________
To talk without thinking is to shoot without aiming.
You, on your knees...
Some call me the Dark Lord, you can call me Master...
Some take delight in the carriages a rollin' and others take delight in the Hurley and the Bowlin', I take delight in the juice of the barley and courting pretty lasses in the mornin' bright and early...
oh yes, you must always satisfy the monkey. 
